


brown eyes, i’ll hold you near

by pixiepower



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: (do i do it any other way?), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Masturbation, Phone Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Relationship Firsts, Sexting, lots of firsts on the horizon for minshua, short term long distance, they are in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:28:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22597093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pixiepower/pseuds/pixiepower
Summary: god, what am i supposed to do when you say stuff like that?joshua:whatever you want, baby.That sounds like… permission. Like Joshua is reaching for his hand so they can cross this line together, if Mingyu wants to. Months of making out and careful hands could not have prepared him for this.i wish you were here,he settles on for his reply, hoping his intended meaning comes across. He lets bravery guide his fingers as he says what he feels, starting simple and honest.•Joshua has to spend some time away in California, and he and Mingyu try sexting for the first time.
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Kim Mingyu
Comments: 14
Kudos: 196
Collections: Seventeen Rare Pair Fest: Round 1





	brown eyes, i’ll hold you near

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SVTRarePairFest](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SVTRarePairFest) collection. 



> title from “soul meets body” by death cab for cutie
> 
> •
> 
>  **prompt:** Established relationship. Josh has to spend some time away in California and they try sexting for the first time.

Five months in, and Mingyu is in love.

He knows it. He can feel it. He feels it in the way his heart swoops every time his phone buzzes, in the way he sees his face in love songs, in the way he’s never felt like this before. It only took him the better part of a year to figure it out, but now that he has, and they got their shit together, he feels it grow every day.

He knows it because when Joshua said he was going to California for a week for work, Mingyu asked what time he needed to drop him off at the airport, and packed him snacks and a note for the long flight, and only let the kiss linger five minutes too long before Joshua had to press a broad hand onto his chest and bashfully tell him security is awful at Incheon and he  _ really  _ had to get going— before he thought better of it and tugged Mingyu down to kiss the daylights out of him one more time.

He knows it because there was a low, aching feeling in his chest, under the flushed daze of being kissed to high heaven by Joshua Hong, and he pulled over onto the roadside before heading back into the city just to send a big-eyed Plain Puppy sticker on KKT, to which Joshua responded with twelve kiss emojis, one for every day he’d be away.

Mingyu was never good at rationing that kind of thing, so Joshua sends a new string of them every morning. One fewer, because every day he’s closer to coming home and kissing him for real. It’s a nice thought.

He’s about halfway through the trip, though, and Mingyu  _ misses  _ Joshua.

There’s only so long Mingyu can putter around his apartment before he gets antsy, everything deep-cleaned and furniture rearranged. Last time he was over Minghao said the feng shui of the place was bad, and Mingyu is pretty sure he was fucking with him because Minghao doesn’t really care about stuff like that, but it was a great excuse for Mingyu to kill two hours with the winning combination of functionally useless internet research and physical labor immediately after getting home from work.

So when he receives his first message of the day from Joshua, he’s feeling a little drained, and it’s only 5:30 in the evening. But reading the carefully crafted messages always gives Mingyu a boost, especially lately.

**joshua:** _ hi babe, i’m sorry i’ve been busy all day ): work ran long and then mom invited family over for dinner and i couldn’t get away until now.  _

**joshua:** _ my cousin’s kids got tired so everyone just left, but i thought they were never going to. these kids and their ipads, game all night, worse than cheol haha. how are you? _

_ sweaty kkkk,  _ he replies, taking a running start and flopping onto his back on his newly-moved bed. It’ll take some getting used to, not waking up right under the window anymore, but Mingyu is adaptable.

**joshua:** _ from what? it’s minus 4 outside _

It really is fucking cold outside. Mingyu doesn’t need to open his front door to know Joshua is right on the mark. His stomach flips over to know that Joshua checked the weather app for Seoul even when he’s timezones away, to know that Joshua was thinking about him. He will never get over knowing that Joshua thinks about him too.

_ oh! i rearranged my apartment! the bed is in the middle of the room now, and i used the side tables from the living room to balance it? myungho said feng shui will help me sleep better, but idk if he was kidding _

**joshua:** _ you’re having trouble sleeping? _

_ yeah, the last couple nights it was kind of hard to get to bed. waking up early for work has been really tough lately... but that’s what coffee is for, right? _

It’s true, too; he’s spent the last six nights restless before sleep, hours and hours tossing and turning, until maybe one o’clock every night, when Joshua messages him  _ good morning _ with a sleepy, disheveled selca, and Mingyu manages to type out a garbled compliment before falling asleep for a solid… five hours.

**joshua:** _ americanos do not replace sleep, mingyu…  _ he messages back admonishingly.  _ i hope you rest better. maybe since you’re so worn out sleep will come more easily tonight _

_ i hope so.  _

_ i was going to take a shower but got lazy halfway through getting ready kk _

**joshua:** _ what do you mean, getting ready, it’s a shower haha _

When the message pings in, Mingyu blushes, scratching at his neck as he tries to figure out what to say. He settles on a selca since a picture is worth a thousand words: arm slung over his reddening face, only one eye and a tired pout visible, and his still-sweaty neck and chest on full display, shirt discarded. The only things left to the imagination are the way his sweatpants are hanging low on his hips, and above that, the little silver star charm dangling from his bellybutton. He wonders how Joshua will react to that when he finally gets to see it.

_ image.jpg _

**joshua:** _ jesus christ _

**joshua:** _ everything running through my head right now sounds like a fuckboy thing to say. you just… look like that? _

Mingyu laughs through the flush of heat flashing over his skin.

_ i’m sorry? _

**joshua:** _ don’t be sorry. you’re so handsome, mingyu-yah. bet you’re pretty all over. _

The unbecoming squeak that Mingyu lets out when he reads the brazen message causes him to drop his phone on his face with a yelp of pain. This is uncharted territory, and Mingyu has never really been good at navigating, always needs Hansol to hold the phone and read the directions to him a full minute before the Maps voice does.

This feels a lot like that, a lot like the way their relationship started, with Joshua… existing, and being clever and beautiful and enchanting and kind of cocky at times, and Mingyu being knocked off-kilter. Clumsy as he is, Mingyu found himself unsurprisingly good at falling hard and fast.

**joshua:** _ i’ve been thinking about it _

_ fuck, hyung, god. god, what am i supposed to do when you say stuff like that? _

**joshua:** _ whatever you want, baby. _

That sounds like… permission. Like Joshua is reaching for his hand so they can cross this line together, if Mingyu wants to. Months of making out and careful hands could not have prepared him for this.

_ i wish you were here,  _ he settles on for his reply, hoping his intended meaning comes across. He lets bravery guide his fingers as he says what he feels, starting simple and honest.

_ i wish i could kiss you right now _

**joshua:** _ me too. i want to kiss you so badly. _

The typing box blinks for a full minute, and Mingyu stares at it, waiting, until:

**joshua:** _ maybe something else, if you wanted _

Shit. Shit. Exhaling sharply, Mingyu tips his head back to think about where all of this is heading. He’s starting to fill out his boxer-briefs thinking about Joshua, alone in his room at nearly one in the morning, alone across the sea, his hands and lips and soft, warm eyes so far away. Mingyu runs a hand up from his chest, from over his heart where it was clutched, creeps it slowly up his neck, feather-light. Gooseflesh raises, and he lets the tingle zip back down his spine before he types his response.

_ i want to do something else with you. think about it all the time _

It’s the truth. Mingyu is nothing if not imaginative, and it’s not like this is the first time he’s imagined Joshua… like this.

But it is the first time he’s had help. The first time Joshua is knowingly encouraging him closer, inching toward the finish line. He likes it, he likes it so much.

**joshua:** _ yeah? _

_ yeah. _

_ wish you could touch me _

Mingyu runs his free hand over his stomach, over his waistband, and finally over his clothed dick, hissing when he presses his palm down to relieve some of the pressure, to give himself a little friction.

**joshua:** _ i would, i’d touch you however you wanted me to. _

Catching his lower lip in between his teeth, Mingyu slides a hand into his sweatpants, wrapping one hand around himself, clutching his cell phone like a lifeline in the other. He works himself into full hardness, swallowing thickly at the thought that maybe, just maybe, Joshua is doing the same thing.

_ i bet your hands feel better than mine do _

_ not enough _

**joshua:** _ can i call you? _

And Mingyu likes that he doesn’t have to pretend he’s cool or aloof as he scrambles for his headphones and struggles to tap out, quicker than he’s typed anything before,  _ yes yes yes _

When he picks up the call, shaking hand fumbling for the button, Mingyu swallows, trying hard not to let on just how desperate he‘s gotten this quickly. “Hi,” he manages, and it only sounds about thirty percent as shaky as he feels.

The soft, warm laugh he loves so much tumbles out of the call into his earbuds, curling into Mingyu’s ears like Joshua is there beside him, like he’s running a soothing hand over his thigh. “Minggoo,” he sighs, but it doesn’t sound shuddery, the way it runs through Mingyu, just longing, which is almost worse, somehow.

“Shua-hyung, I miss you,” Mingyu can’t help saying. He needs to say it first, make sure Joshua knows how he’s feeling. “I miss you.”

Joshua’s voice melts through him, crackling a little with the seventeen-hour time difference. Despite the eleven-hour flight, the sound of it pulls at the tightness in Mingyu’s chest, undoing the shoelaces and letting him breathe. “I miss you too. So much. You would like it here, I think,” he says.

_ ‘I think,’ _ he says, like Mingyu hasn’t spent the last week envisioning a California vacation, kissing Joshua under a palm tree in the middle of the day, golden sunlight bathing his skin and saltwater curling his hair at the edges. The image comes unbidden every time he has to wrap himself in a scarf and coat, bracing himself against the windchill, but also just. Any time he’s alone too long.

There’s a beat, then Joshua asks, “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

He knows exactly what. Mingyu was half-hoping they wouldn’t get to it, which is honestly unlike him, but there’s something about Joshua that makes him flip over and bury his face in his pillow, feeling heat blush further up his cheeks and down his chest. It’s different to try and say it out loud. It’s no secret how much Mingyu wants Joshua, in what ways, but they’ve— they’ve never—

“Were you touching yourself?” Joshua asks, and, yeah,  _ now  _ he sounds affected.

Mingyu lets out a surprised whimper, hips pushing against the bed involuntarily. He wants to say no, he wasn’t touching himself, wants to go back to messaging where he’s braver, wants this so bad, wants him so bad.

There’s a long exhale on the line. “Mingyu,” Joshua says, almost a murmur. Urging.

“Yeah,” Mingyu says, squeezing his eyes shut. “Yeah, I was, I—”

_ “Fuck,”  _ Joshua groans, and Mingyu really doesn’t know if he’s going to make it. He’s never seen, never heard Joshua like this, and it figures that only now, when he’s away for days and days and days, is when they finally broach the subject. 

Mingyu tightens his hand on the pillow, lifting his head so his voice isn’t muffled, but keeping his eyes closed. “I was thinking about you.”

“Yeah?” The tone of Joshua’s voice is tense, low and eager, like he’s whispering in Mingyu’s ear. “What were you thinking about?”

The insides of Mingyu’s eyelids flicker with the images he conjured, and he takes a deep breath. 

He starts over, at the beginning, with what he’s always thinking about: “Kissing you. I love kissing you, it’s my favorite. I like when we kiss slow, and you take your time with me.” 

In response, there’s an  _ mmm  _ noise that Mingyu finds encouraging, and he turns back over to face the ceiling so he can touch his lips with a cautious hand, running his fingertips over his jawline and pressing down, the way Joshua’s big hand spans his jaw when he kisses him deep, warm and hungry. Mingyu could kiss Joshua for hours. He has, honestly, and it never feels like enough.

“You’re so fun to kiss,” Joshua says, and it sounds like he’s smiling. “You never let me lean up to kiss you, either, you’re always so eager.” He laughs, and it makes Mingyu smile, even as his face flushes warmer.

“Do you want me to?” he asks. Not insecure, just wondering.

Joshua hums thoughtfully. “Sometimes. You’re so tall, and so— so cute, I.” He cuts himself off with a little noise, something like a swallowed cough.

Mingyu is beyond grateful Joshua can’t see him, face bright pink and bashful smile plastered onto his face like he can’t help it. He can’t help the way a swarm of honeybees buzzes under his skin. He feels giggly and his stomach feels swoopy.

“Your laugh is cute,” Joshua laughs, and Mingyu groans, covering his face with his hands.

“Shua-hyung…”

Not for the first time Mingyu wonders if Joshua can read his mind, because he insists, “No, let me compliment my boyfriend!”

“It’s hard!” Mingyu laughs, and then his eyes snap open and he scrambles up into a sitting position. He squawks, “Wait, I mean—”

But Joshua catches it, because he’s the most perceptive man Mingyu has ever met, and he always seems to see right to the heart of things. “Oh?” he asks, tone dropping into something more suggestive, still tinged with a grin.

Mingyu whines. “Hyung!”

“We don’t have to,” Joshua says quietly, “It’s just good to hear your voice.”

“I want to,” Mingyu says, all in a rush, “With you. Is that okay? Do you want to…?” Mingyu asks, wincing when he can’t get all the words out. He’s never  _ shy.  _ He’s never had difficulty telling a partner what he wants, being intimate with them, so why are things so difficult all of a sudden?

But Joshua says, “Yeah,” quickly, with conviction, reading Mingyu’s mind again, and Mingyu realizes suddenly that it’s because this  _ matters. _

It’s because Mingyu loves Joshua that he’s nervous about this step, about wanting to do right by him, the way he always is. Joshua always does right by him. They spent so long falling in love before they got together that everything feels like a long time coming. Mingyu thinks it’s all worth the wait, but this… this is nice too.

“What are you doing right now?” Mingyu tries, huffing a little with frustration when it comes out sounding so simple, conversational, rather than laden with suggestion like he meant it to.

There’s a warm chuckle in response, and Mingyu closes his eyes, grins up at the ceiling. The slow creep toward the edge is feeling more familiar, and he lets his hand rest on his stomach, fingertips dragging over his skin gently just to keep them moving, keep the warmth tugging behind his bellybutton where his piercing glints. He can afford to tease himself a little.

But his short fingernails accidentally bite into his skin when Joshua says, “I’m thinking about kissing down your neck to your chest. Do you like your nipples touched?”

Mingyu goes a little breathless, trails a hand back up to his chest, circles one nipple delicately, imagining Joshua looking up at him with those eyes where he would hover over his chest and stomach. “Yeah, yes.”

“Me too,” Joshua says quietly, confessional, and there’s a pinging, alarmlike noise in Mingyu’s head, something that says,  _ you better catalogue this information, these are the most important tidbits you’ll ever hear in your fucking life,  _ and Mingyu files it away in his brain for use later.

“I would do that for you,” Mingyu says, pictures Joshua in his lap, grinding down as Mingyu’s fingers, his lips, work over Joshua’s chest and nipples. It’s an overwhelming visual. Mingyu pulls his hand away from his lower stomach for fear of bringing himself too close this soon.

“Yeah? You’re so good.”

At that, Mingyu lets out a high-pitched whine, and he swears when his back arches at the praise that he hears Joshua laugh through his headphones. It’s not mean, either, just… fascinated. Like he’s learning, and that it’s making things better.

“Tell me how you like it,” Joshua says, and it isn’t a question.

Mingyu shuts his eyes tight and tries to remember what other partners have done with him that he’s liked, replacing their faces with Joshua’s, replacing his sense memories of their hands with Joshua’s. He squirms, recalling the time Jihyo pegged him, his favorite sexual experience thus far. She was patient and kind and it was  _ good, _ and now Mingyu has to contend with the idea of Joshua taking him apart like that, gentle and passionate, with all the added emotion of literally being head over heels in love with him.

“I like knowing I’m doing well, that I’m making you feel good,” Mingyu says. That much is obvious.

Joshua hums, a warm sound. “Is that why you turn so pink every time I tell you how handsome you are, how good a kisser you are?”

Heat flashes over Mingyu’s ears. “Hyung,” he whines, and Joshua laughs.

“Oh, that’s a yes.”

Of course it is, but it’s different to  _ hear  _ it.

“I. I like being teased,” Mingyu says, unbearably warm. He doesn’t have to look at Joshua, that would be overwhelming, but he keeps his eyes shut tight anyway, squeezing at the base of his dick to keep himself from getting too close to the edge. He says it like they’ve done it before, verbalizes what he wants when he says, “I like when you try to get me close just by fingering me, make me wait for it.”

Joshua lets out a sharp exhale. “Mingyu, fuck. Could you come like that?”

“I’ve never tried,” Mingyu says. Quietly, he adds, “We could try.” He probably could, especially if he tries with Joshua.

“Yeah?” There’s a rustle, the blown-out, fried sound of air rushing too close to the speaker. A moan that sounds like it’s coming from far away. (Mingyu supposes it is, but the technicality of that tightens a bittersweet feeling in his chest, so he tries to dismiss it for now.)

And then: 

“Has anyone ever eaten you out?”

The shocked wail Mingyu lets out is surreal, the force with which he claps a hand over his mouth to muffle his desperate whining almost painful. He’s desperately hard at the sudden mental image of Joshua’s kind, beautiful eyes gazing heatedly up at him from between his legs, where he’s mouthing and licking at Mingyu’s hole. He wants it, too much.

“No,” Mingyu whimpers, “No one ever—”

“God, please, can I? You sound so beautiful, I bet you look beautiful, please, Mingyu,” Joshua asks, this side of panting.

“Please,” Mingyu echoes, hoping his headphones don’t fall out with his involuntary wriggling as his head digs into the pillow.

He knows if he touches himself now, it’ll all be over, so he lets his cock drool precome onto his tummy and keeps one hand clamped over his mouth like a brass mute, the other fisted tightly in his sheets. The corner of his fitted sheet pulls up and pops off the mattress with a stupid, springy noise, and it’s a testament to how far gone Mingyu is that he can’t find it in himself to care right now.

Joshua is moaning quietly into his ear from an ocean away, and Mingyu wants him close, wants to touch his face and look into his eyes and tell him he loves him while they do this. 

It feels right, though, to take this leap with him. To explore this together while they have the chance and the bravery, and when Joshua comes home in a week they can discuss even more then.

And start to turn fantasies into reality. Mingyu’s heart picks up speed in his chest just thinking about it.

“What do  _ you  _ want?” he asks, desperate to know.

“Shit, where should I start?” Joshua says, with a breathless sort of half-laugh. “I want you to fuck me so good I have to take a day off work. I want to make you come with my cock, my hands, my mouth. I want to kiss you so bad, God, I want to kiss you, Mingyu, I want everything with you.”

With each suggestion, Mingyu’s hips kick up, and he can’t put it off anymore. He wants everything with Joshua, too. A strangled mewl is ripped from his throat when he runs fingers over his dick, and he starts to work himself over in earnest.

Needy and high, Mingyu whines, “I think about your hands on me all the time, your mouth and your hands.” 

Mingyu’s hand moves faster on himself, tightening just a little as he tries to stave off his orgasm. Imagines Joshua’s warm, pretty lips pressing against his neck as he wraps one hand around Mingyu’s cock, skin moisturized-soft but a little rough and callused underneath from guitar. He knows how they feel hand-in-hand, on the nape of his neck, caressing his cheek, but this is so different. He wants it, wants it, wants it.

“I want to get my hands on you, jerk you off nice and slow,” Joshua says, low and desperate, “Want to see what you look like when you come.”

“Gonna— _ nnh, _ gonna come, hyung,” Mingyu moans, pitching high and low in turn as he rolls his hips up into his hand.

“Will you come for me, baby?” Joshua whispers, like he can’t manage it louder.

The insides of Mingyu’s eyelids flash white as he keens, coming hard with a whimpery, panted  _ ah, ah, Joshua, please, ah,  _ eyes rolling back despite how tightly squeezed shut they are. His back arches off the bed as he spills over his fist and across his stomach, whole body trembling.

As he comes down, Mingyu hears Joshua, breathing heavy but clear-voiced as he chants, “Minggoo-yah, oh, Mingyu, Mingyu, Mingyu,” before he cuts himself off with a gasp. Mingyu keeps his eyes screwed shut as he shudders through their comedowns, listening to Joshua let out a breathy little sigh, imagining, imagining, imagining Joshua’s beautiful face contorted in pleasure. His hips twitch a little, sensitive, when Joshua takes a deep breath, hums over the line, a satisfied little moan melting right through Mingyu’s ears.

Between heaving breaths, Joshua starts laughing, and the bubbling sound of it makes Mingyu laugh too. It’s ridiculous, in the way sex things always feel when you’re done, and Mingyu’s skin is tacky with come, and he feels warm and sweaty and silly and happy and in love.

“Wow,” Mingyu giggles, and Joshua’s laugh, breathy and low, gets louder.

“Yeah,” Joshua says, and Mingyu doesn’t need to close his eyes to imagine the smile crinkling Joshua’s eyes, pushing up his cheeks and lighting up his face. “I can’t believe I have to wait another week to get back to you.”

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder, hyung, right?”

“My heart’s plenty fond already.”

Cheeks aching from smiling, Mingyu pushes up into a sitting position, reaching over to grab something to wipe up. He wiggles from side to side to halfheartedly tuck the corner of the bedsheet back over the mattress, too, while he’s at it.

“Hey, hyung?” Mingyu asks, wrinkling his nose at the feeling of the tissue on his sticky skin.

“Mm?”

“I love you.”

“Minggoo-yah…” Joshua starts, and he lets out another little breath. It’s not desperate now, just soft. Mingyu hopes there’s a smile behind it, too. Can tell for certain that there is when he finishes, “I love you too.”

It’s still nice to hear it. 

“Good,” Mingyu says. “Now go to bed, it’s so late! You have work in the morning!”

Worth it, though. If it takes another twenty minutes for them to finally hang up, so be it.

**joshua:** _ goodnight, babe _

**joshua:** _ image.jpg _

Mingyu lets the picture download in high-definition and nearly chokes on his breath at the sight of Joshua’s selca. He’s spread out on his bed at home, face flushed coral pink, hair messy, and eyelids half-shut; his lips are pinker than usual, maybe from biting down on them to keep himself quiet, but he’s smiling coyly, almost a lazy smirk. If that weren’t enough, Mingyu zooms in on the unfamiliar, oversized shirt Joshua is wearing, trying to identify the design from where it’s tugged down a little. He furrows his eyebrows as he looks, and looks, until it clicks. The shirt looks extra big because it isn’t Joshua’s. It’s Mingyu’s. 

Joshua is wearing one of Mingyu’s shirts. Joshua got himself off while he was wearing one of Mingyu’s shirts.

One of Mingyu’s shirts! Fuck! He didn’t even know it was missing, it’s one of his too-big pajama t-shirts, usually neatly folded in his drawer, and now it’s busy falling off Joshua’s shoulder where his skin is flushed like petals, his pretty collarbones exposed. Mingyu feels feral. Joshua looks wrecked and fucked-out and gorgeous, and he’s in Mingyu’s goddamn t-shirt!

Mingyu buries his face in his pillow, flipping it over first so he’s not facedown in a puddle of his own coital drool, and screams, the sound muffled in the fabric but shrieking nonetheless. His boyfriend is going to be the death of him.

But what a way to go.

He’s grinning when he lifts his head, typing out a string of drooling emojis and a rainbow of every heart the keyboard has. But more than that, he needs to make sure one thing is absolutely clear:

_ god, i love you _

**joshua:** _ i love you too ♡ _

Joshua will be home soon. They have a lot of firsts to get to together.

And that makes Mingyu smile more than anything.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!
> 
> find me on [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/pixiepowerao3) and [curiouscat](http://www.curiouscat.me/pixiepower/)!


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